Extended family - Who'd have them?

You would think that I'd be a frenzy of boxes and packing and stressing and hurrying right now; work is picking up (being involved in refrigeration, it happens..), Christmas is on it's way and our whole lives need to be picked up and moved.

Instead, we are going to see old friends of ours for lunch, bash around their pool and do a whole lot of nothing.

I have stopped being all things to all people. The perfect wife, the perfect mother, the perfect assistant manager and the perfect daughter. Because, too often, they collide and I am constantly feel as though I am letting someone down. The pressure cooker went bang on Friday night; G came home with tea to find a bottle of wine gone; and me sitting on the deck, tears silently running down my face.

His family have pissed me off badly this week. Not all of them, but half of his brothers and their other halves. Their hypocrisy astounds me, their self importance baffles me and their expectations are endless.

It was C's birthday on Wednesday. He had a ball; ran into R's room and dragged his school uniform out because 'now he can go to school'. G's eldest brother called and pretended he was Jamie Whincup - which made C's day. "MUM. JAMIE.WHINCUP.SPOKE.TO.ME'. It cost Chris nothing and it made his day.

The others. Well. After this big hoo ha about not doing Kris Kringle because 'it's more personal to get all the children a present' and 'I really want my daughters to get a present' - not one single thought came to C from either of them on his birthday. But, an invitation to a Christening did.

Each year, I send each and every neice/nephew a $20 voucher and a card. It's just something small to say that we are thinking of them on their birthdays. The most personal day of the year, I'd have thought. But, because it's not their child - big deal.

Before J had children, the kids would be lucky to get a card with some money in it for Christmas. Now he has children - we're all expected to buy presents because his children must have presents.

Instead of a thought for C's birthday, an invitation to a Christening came. Now, I'm not big on Christenings, or any sort of religion for that matter, but I am very respectful of those who are not hypocritical about it; those who live it. I once knew a mormon who I had a hell of a lot of respect for; because she lived her beliefs. This Christening? Present grabbing exercise; no more no less.

For starters, mum and dad aren't married. And I wonder how do you christen children in a church, when the religion itself would call them bastards? Money talks I imagine, but there is no way no how I would do any sort of religious ceremony on my children; we weren't married in a church (a chapel on some beautiful grounds), so how could we enter a church, without a sanctimonious marriage and christen our children? Doesn't work with me; but I would go to keep the peace.

Anyway. That same day, G's work Christmas party is on. At Puffing Billy. With Christmas presents for the kids, lollies and a whole lot of fun.

I assumed we'd be sucking it all up (as usual) and going to the stupid hypocritical christening so G could just 'keep the peace'. We're not though. He has chosen to go to the Christmas party. So they've hurt him more than I thought too; because he'd never do that.

Family suck.

PS: Dad is still same old same old; they won't start dialysis until his bowel starts bleeding and not coping with the treatment now. Awesome. Sane dad or insane dad, depending on the day. We're also goign to try and get into the house early so that we can have christmas there together; as we're starting to think it'll be dads last.

PPS - my sister hasn't found a job; my stupid parents are paying her. Would you get off your butt and look for a job when you were getting paid good money to sit on your arse? I have lost an awful lot of respect for that girl.