Friends

It has been said that there are 3 types of friends. Reason friends; who come into your life for (duh) a reason; season friends who (duh) are in your life for a season and real friends.

I tend not to do 'reason' friends or 'season' friends. Hence, the amount of friends I have you could just about fit on one hand.

I said goodbye to a friend not long ago. A very VERY old and dear friend. Nothing bad happened, no arguments were had; we've just simply grown apart. And, not too long ago, another friend left. Again, no issues, no tears; just life and the changes that come with it.

25 years is a long time to have a friend; but it is also very hard to let go of because of that. But, walking into 2009, I decided to just simply say goodbye. And it feels nice to go with the ebb and flow of life, instead of fighting it (which, I'm more than used to doing).

I really believe that you only have room for xxxx friends. That fate (or whatever you want to call it) will, as a result of new friends, yank that door open and take one away as compensation. Sometimes it will hurt like all hell - other times, you look around 5 weeks later and realise that that friend in particular has been gone for far longer than you thought.

Now I've said goodbye, I feel much better. Not hurt, not angry. A little sad; but on a whole other level, I feel as though my past is more and more just that. Each little thing that 'knew' of Shel all those years ago is drifting off into the cosmos - leaving me with less and less crutches to stumble through. And, instead of being scared I've lost that crutch - I feel stronger and more accepting of what life is going to throw next.

Next year will be a big one for me. Not literally, but mentally. And, I'm glad I'm doing so well.