and the beat goes on......

I have re-read that last entry; and it's nice to know that it wasn't as 'blah' as I thought. Usually on my blog, I will simply keep typing and then press 'publish'. I'm not one for editing much of anything; although I probably should. I type as part of my job, so mostly, punctuation/spelling mistakes are edited as I go. I couldn't stand just typing and then having to go back through correcting myself!!

I am feeling better about things every day. Not 'oh what a feeling' type of better; but I have definately found some accountability and responsibility for me. It's bizarre just how often I have excuses for things. I'm trying not to do that anymore.

I hired a treadmill the other day and have been using it nightly / morning, so that probably accounts for some of my upbeat mood. I used to walk 4km most mornings before G went to work; but since he's been gone, I haven't been able to. Sure, I could leave the kids here whilst they are sleeping - but I'm pretty sure DHS would have something to say. Although, I would bet I'd break a time record!!

Weight is finally moving down again! I lost a fair bit of weight (10kgs) 18 months or so ago and I haven't moved in the last 12. I've been walking the line though and I know precisely why I haven't moved; I'm suprised I haven't gone up!!

When I lost those 10kgs I felt amazing. So empowered, strong & proud. I felt less self concious and more positive than I remember feeling. So, I think I stayed there. Didn't go either way, but enjoyed that time.

18 months later though, I feel icky. Too big, too unfit and too unhealthy. So, I'm aiming for the next 10. And when I get there, I'll probably hang out there for 18 more months!! ;) I enjoy savouring that sense of acheivement - what can I say!!!??

The kids and I had a great day yesterday. We lolled around the house and played outside, and then a girlfriend came over with her 3. Riley went to kinder & Connor came outside with me and helped sweep until he went to bed.

I have missed my children so much. Not literally; christ, they are with me nearly all the time. But, emotionally. Because I've shut up shop for so long, I feel as though they haven't been getting me. Just some imitation.

It's all about me for a little while.

I will try and get some photos of my garden shortly - all my vegies are growing!! Although, I must find out when Beetroot looks ready to pick - I've never grown it before, and I have no idea to tell when it's ready for picking!!!!